After a long time, I pause writing because I thought my self that I am busy, kinda settled with current job and all. Less good Bollywood movies and any other reason. Starting to thought, maybe this is the reason I can’t be a writer, because I don’t write, even a single phrase or sentence. After bouncing right and there, I found my self in a different way. Self discovery happens when you least expected it.
To let you enjoy with this silly story, there are key partners. One of them is Voldie. Haven’t been mentioned the others since I don’t have thoughts on them, but it turned out they becoming my support system, out of professional matter. This is also remarks another step and journey I had, about him.
Nah bro, there won’t be ‘with’ there. Because we are just a loner person, but one of us is pretend not to be.
I don’t know how much this is project to all, but it turned out that your first impression was not lying, even trying to say the truth. So I suggest to trust it and plan your action.
Self Discovery: Not Inferior, but Submissive
I know this is quite funny. Someone who is submissive (not BDSM though) tend to be inferior, because the superior is key player.
Sub.mis.sive: ready to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive.
I still remember what I said to MeaKer. I’ll just listen to someone who has bigger picture from I saw and correctly true! Aha! Sorry grammar nazi, I kinda not like you today. Being workmate with Voldie made me realized few things, and one of them is submissive. I tend to conform his authority. But it turned out that he even not realizing it, and it is bad. Because for whatever next thing he said will play bigger impact to me.
Another Self Discovery: Anxiety
Yeah dude. It is suck. I am a suicidal person. I admit it, I’ve been have a feeling where I am not being appreciate for who I am, regardless family. It brought me back to memories where I’ll lock my self in my room and not talking. Very unhealthy, but my family is an art! I can’t even talk with them.
When I need a short break from Voldie–really I don’t need that kind of attitude of you. By what gesture or intention. I got a Sick Leave letter by hospital, and it has Zypraz. I thought, after all this time, I got the right prescription, at least I got what I need.
Things gone wild when I told Faizan. Anyway, short update, both us, Faizan and I decided not to go for each other. Everyone has their priorities, and it is not match to each other. God, bless his soul! He said the after effect of the drug is when you no longer consume it, in short, addictive.
I am so sleepy, can’t take longer writing, but hey, at least I force my self to write, to distract my mind from sadness and suicidal. Be kind! That’s one thing that I’d be happy to tell people! You won’t know their journey, what they’ve been thru that day, please be kind.
Say thanks if they help. Every credit matters, because you won’t know maybe you’re the reason for their happiness that day. Maybe you’re their role model and it is so good to be notice by one. Be kind, but do not too kind. People will get annoy by that. (fan)