Ohaiyou! Long time no see! I should finish my task, but I am too sleepy to work on it. So I decide to tell you a story. Story about life, and full of uncertainty things.
What will you do, if there’s someone, divorced, is so inevitable gorgeous?
To be honest, I never thought that I will face such kind of trouble. My life was smooth, but as per today… whole life is changing like a season. I don’t know whether this is autumn, or winter, but hopefully it is really spring.
This guy is so mysterious. I always seeking for him, and always missing him, a lot. He is unique as rainbow cake, what will every color taste for?
He is always alone. I can’t say he is a loner, but sometime I feel that he is so damn need an a companion. But choose not to. Irony.
There are few things that left me blank and filled out uncertainty. First, his past, who is he, really.
Second, ulterior motives. I got warn by a close person of mine, and she told me that this guy is not the one, but in 2 months, someone in past will come, and yeah, you should compare!
We should not breach our future, we just should plan the best of it. It really bugging me for some times, I can’t think clearly. There are no certain things that happen to me around this time.
Future is full of uncertainty things.
And I am so in to future. I need assurance for that one. But it can be treasure back to my self, right? But right now, the most thing that I need is assurance from other parties. I need to be assured that what I am doing now is better than before. Way that I am heading to, is way more convenient than before. And the man that I clicked for few weeks is bring enlightenment and an answer.
She told me that there are 2 guys, but none of them that I really know. First, classmate. And then the distant friend of mine. Who are they, really?
Full of uncertainty.
I can say that there are none from classmate or things. I never made an communication with them, unless the Cancer Guy, but I don’t think that he will back, since he is full of trouble. Distant friend, who is he? I have no idea.
But if we talk about one year or two year ago, it is really like that. CG and my ex.
It meets expectation.
But for now, there are none. That is the fact.
Recently break up. Have no intention to find another one because I am so depleted and I don’t want to have such below mine. He should be smarter than me, and have his own hobbies that won’t disturb mine.
It is precisely like what I felt about 3 years ago.
In a way, I care for him. Longing him. The differences are, first, experiences and past.
One has no spectacular past, since what he did was dating all along, but this one was married once, and now divorce. Low commitment. And full of mysteries, like he is no Scorpio man.
My perspective. You should know my perspective, before advice me.
Kinda liberal, so no conservative way to approach me. Have no problem with live-in-relationship. Commitment, yes, but I am not into makeup someone or something that doesn’t right, I do what I like, don’t judge. If you don’t like it, then don’t make a fuss about it.
I have a Virgo friend, and both of them a total different. I believe that habit make differences. Actually, I prefer to give my life in hand of this virgo than my friend. I don’t believe him.
Virgo in a nutshell: perfectionist, control freak, skeptical, analytical, great, great observant, very very helpful, oh, visioner juga.
I bet he knew that I have an interest to him, and he does manage it, very good. According to ‘Mba’, he use to fulfill his needs. As a companion to discuss, to talk, and attention.
I don’t mind that, because, hell, I need that one also. 14 months of relationship, I can count how many we had discussed things, in one hand. Slowly make my brain dead, and it is saddening.
I trust my ex, I do loved him, but this love was way too tiring and I can’t tolerate it anymore. No, that was not because I have no patience, but my brain has to consume something, something good.
Again, full of uncertainty.
My life nowadays.